Limerick Battle UPDATED
He started it!
My brother Steve, that is.
He & I somehow (ok: he started it) got into calling each other doodyhead a few years ago, so our limericks frequently work in doodyhead references.
Subject: I say old chap…
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From: Steve Meckleburg
Date: Wed, Sep 8, 2010 at 1:47 PM
To: Brian
Your doodyness grows at a pace
That would credit an auto race.
It zooms and it zips
And the words from our lips
Are all classified envious praise.
[I’ll mention — I received this email while sitting in a meeting at work. Nobody knew my blood was boiling! — Ed.]
—————
From: Brian Jones
Date: Wed, Sep 8, 2010 at 2:57 PM
To: Steve
Were doodyness measured in days
It would take years to number the ways
Yours eclipses us all.
Plus, if it were a ball,
Yours would blot out Sol’s life-giving rays.
—————
From: Steve Meckleburg
Date: Wed, Sep 8, 2010 at 3:29 PM
To: Brian Jones
Anything close to the phiz
Eclipses things far away, viz.:
Take a string and loop it, Sir;
The knot could block Jupiter,
In spite of how massive it is.
—————
From: Brian Jones
Date: Wed, Sep 8, 2010 at 3:40 PM
To:
‘t’is true that relative positions
Might effect one’s spatial cognitions
But this case ain’t so subtle:
The lads on the Shuttle
Must outline your doody’s proportions.
—————
From: Steve Meckleburg
Date: Wed, Sep 8, 2010 at 4:07 PM
To: Brian Jones
The tie-breaker will the the Hubble,
Which will burst your outrageous bubble.
The most sharp-eyed ‘scope
Will prove you’re a dope
And your Shuttle lads are not redoubtable.
—————
From: Brian Jones
Date: Thu, Sep 9, 2010 at 10:30 AM
To:
Theology majors have asked
Whether God can make something so vast
He Himself cannot lift;
They could soon end their rift
If they gazed on your doodyness at last.
PS I see, it takes a strong telescope to discern my own doodyness.
Thank you, sir! THANK YOU! GOOD DAY! I said GOOD DAY.
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE
Steve saw fit to respond backpedal:
God was very distressed
When his innocent children transgressed.
Eve ate that apple
And now all must grapple
With not only sin but your doodyness.
It’s sad when a person’s IQ
Sets his understanding askew.
I meant better ‘scopes
Would show orbiting dopes
That that doody is not me, it’s you.
